Monday, March 21, 2016

Atheists filming Banachek series in Bolingbrook

Mentalist Banachek (Promotional Image)
The controversial Roku network, Atheist TV, will be filming their new series in Bolingbrook this month, which stars mentalist Banachek.

American Atheists spokesperson Jill Goodfellow explained why they’re filming in Bolingbrook.  “Television shows, like The Mentalist, have been copying Banachek for years.  Our show will feature the real Banachek, and Bolingbrook is the best place to film our series.  That, and its too expensive to film in Las Vegas or Los Angeles.  For a modest donation to a charity we won’t name, we were given permission to film anywhere in Bolingbrook!  It’s a great deal for our small network!”

According to Goodfellow, Banachek will play a professional skeptic who travels around the country to expose psychic frauds.  If he finds a real psychic, he’ll give that person one billion dollars.

In one scene, filmed on Lindsey LN, two men stood outside a house with a sign that read, “Talk to the Dead: Special discount today.”

Man 1:  I can’t wait to conduct my tests on Zantada!  This time, I know we’ll get conclusive proof she’s a psychic
Man 2: This investigation will make Daily Grail the most important web site on the Internet, and silence those skeptics once and for all.
(Old man walks out)  
Old Man:  Sorry.  The other investigator arrived early, and convincingly debunked Zantada.  Your services are no longer needed.
(Man walks out)
Man 1:  Banachek.
Man 2:  Or is it really pronounced Bandana?
Banachek:  You know, there’s a Polish saying.  It doesn’t matter how many rubber duckies you have in the bathtub, a cat will alway find a real mouse.

Goodfellow denied that the show is a remake of the TV series Banacek.

“Maybe that show was based on who they thought Banachek would become.  If that’s the case, we’re doing the show as it was meant to be done.  It’s the only rational answer!”

An anonymous Bolingbrook police officer claimed to pulled over Banachek.

“He was driving a car while blindfolded. I said that he needed to have a clear view of the road.  This is amazing.  He read my badge number, said I needed to shave, and asked why police car looked nothing like the movie versions of the Bolingbrook police department.  I let him go because his sixth sense seemed good enough for me.”

Though Banachek will be leaving at the end of the month, Goodfellow say that he may return soon.

“He’s featured in the new Karen Stollznow novel, Hits and Mrs.  If we find the right people, and if she lets us use a script that gives Banachek a larger role, we might film in Bolingbrook again.  With a little CGI, we can make Hidden Lakes look like the Australian Outback!”

Also in the Babbler:

Alien arrested for causes Clow Airport plane crash
Illegal space aliens captured at Bolingbrook Oberweis
Officials warn of UFOs disguised as drones spying on Bolingbrook
God to smite Bolingbrook on 3/25/16

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