Monday, October 17, 2011

New paranormal show to investigate the Hidden Lakes Monster

A picture of the Hidden Lakes Monster from 1999.
Will the Hidden Lakes monster reveal itself on television?  The executive producer of “Belief Verses Doubt” hopes so.

“We wanted to do something different for one of the shows.”  Said Steve Thomas.  “Area 51 has been covered to death.  Bigfoot is so 1970s.  Who hasn’t done a show on Nessie?  Even Leonard Nimoy did a story on Ogopogo.”

That something different is Bolingbrook’s Hidden Lakes Monster.  Hidden Lakes is the smallest body of water known to have a lake monster.  First spotted in 1989, the Hidden Lakes Monster is believed to be a half-duck and half-sea serpent creature.  Most people only see the creature’s head and assume it is a duck.  

To date, only person, a park naturalist, is believed to have been eaten by the creature.  The Bolingbrook Park District denies the death, even though they advertised for a new naturalist shortly after it was reported to The Babbler.

In 1999, a famed cryptozoologist Ken Zobel tried mount an underwater expedition to find the creature.  The Park District denied the request, and laughed at his claim that Hidden Lakes are really glacier lakes, and not a converted trout farm.

“The Hidden Lakes monster has all making of a great episode.”  Said Thomas.  “You got the Chicago demographic.  You go the suburban demographic.  Sure its a lake monster, but it’s set in a park, so you’re going to have the concerned parents demographic.  Since it’s an endangered animal, we’ll also get the environmentalist demographic.  This episode has win written all over it!”

“Belief Verses Doubt,” will try to appeal to both believers of the supernatural as well as so called skeptics.

“Most shows that have hardcore skeptics are boring and never make it past the pitch stage.  Just look at ‘The Skeptologists!’  This show will be different!”

According to Thomas, BVD feature two teams of investigators, a skeptical team, and a team of believers.  Episode are divided between both teams.  In the end, the audience is invited to vote on which team made the most compelling case.  The winning team gets an undisclosed cash prize.

“This show should get the skeptics to stop arguing with each other and log onto our web page.  The skeptics will try to pump up their poll numbers.  The believers will try to beat the skeptics.  Everyone else will want to see what’s going on.  In the end, we’ll end up with high ratings!”

For the Hidden Lakes Monster episode, John Downes, directer of Centre for Fortean Zoology, will lead the believer investigative team.  Sharon Hill, of The Doubtful Newsblog, will lead the skeptical team, currently nicknamed, “iDoubtit.”

A spokesperson for Downes released a statement which said, “After the dreadful editing of the Penn and Teller episode, I’m looking forward to being vindicated in Bolingbrook.”

A spokesperson for Sharon Hill said, “She looks forward to proving that Hidden Lakes is too small to support a lake monster, and to finally earn money for her skepticism!”

No one from the Bolingbrook Parks District would comment on the record.  Our sources did say that they don’t mind film crews in Hidden Lakes, just as long as they stay out of the water.

Also in The Babbler:

Aliens spotted at Occupy Chicago
Mothman visits Chicago
Noisy Astronomer searches for Bigfoot in Wisconsin
God to smite Bolingbrook on 10/19/11

Please note: All articles on this site are works of fiction.

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