Sunday, October 3, 2010

Will County judge dismisses Skepticality ‘out of body’ harassment lawsuit

Do these two have the power of psychic projection?
A Will County judge dismissed a lawsuit against the hosts of “Skepticality” accusing them of “harassment by out of body projection.”

The potentially groundbreaking lawsuit was dismissed on the grounds that the podcast hosts weren’t physically served papers.

“Even if these alleged projections are real, placing papers on a night stand for them to see does not meet the legal requirement for serving notice to the defendants.”

Skepticality, a skeptical podcast founded in 2005, is hosted by Derek Colanduno and Robynn “Swoopy” McCarthy. The hosts are critical of paranormal claims, and have built their careers promoting “critical thinking.”

Which makes the anonymous plaintiffs' claims especially surprising. The married couple filing the suit claims to be former skeptics who had a sudden change of heart.

The wife said the visits started in 2009. According to court records, she said woke up early in the morning and Colanduno was standing by the end of the bed. She said he started angrily speaking backwards, then vanished. Colanduno, according to her, would reappear every other night. He would say “nonsensical phrases” and then vanish.

About a month later, McCarthy started to appear before the husband. According to him, McCarthy would start off by saying, “Hi, I’m Swoopy! Why won’t you come to Dragon*con?” Then she would say “a bunch of gibberish” in an angry tone.

The couple believes that the Skepticality hosts found out they they couldn’t afford to attend the Atlanta based science fiction convention. The hosts also help organize a series of presentations call “The Skeptic Track” at Dragon*con. Because the couple didn’t attend, the couple believes the hosts, “used their secret psychic powers of projection to harass the couple into attending the next Dragon*con.”

The couple had sought over a million dollars in damages for “lost sleep, martial distress and the pain and suffering caused by the loss of their belief in skepticism.”

When asked to comment, McCarthy denied any knowledge of the lawsuit or any hearing.

“It sounds like this couple is suffering from sleep paralysis.” Said McCarthy. “It’s what most so-called alien abductions are. In this case, the wife started dreaming about Derek, and then the husband started dreaming about me. That’s assuming this is a real story.”

During the phone interview, Colanduno walked into the room, and asked who she was talking to. When she replied it was The Babbler, Colanduno asked to speak with this reporter.

Elyse told me about you guys!” Yelled Colanduno. “I will make sure that “What’s the Harm” will devote an entire page to your nonsense.”

McCarthy cleared her throat.

“Now?” Asked Colanduno.

“I didn’t get a chance to, and this will be on the Internet.”

Colanduno sighed, and then said, “You guys could use some education. Why don’t you go to Audible.com and download some audiobooks. In fact, we’ll soon have a special offer where you can pre-order The Skeptic Society’s Michael Shermer’s upcoming book, ‘Free Minds, Free Markets, Free Beer!’”

Colanduno coughed and then continued.

“And as a bonus, you’ll also get a free copy of Shermer’s ‘The Skeptic’s Guide to Meeting Women!’”

McCarthy sneezed.

Continued Colanduno , “So don’t even think of hugging me, even though I'm vaccinated! Is that all of our sponsors?”

“Yep. For this week.” Replied Swoopy.

Also in The Babbler:

Thirty foot tall pit bull spotted in Delavan, WI.
Bears denying cloning Jim McMahn
Sources: Bonnie also considering running for mayor of Chicago
God to smite Bolingbrook on 10/6/10

Please note: All articles on this site are works of fiction.

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